Monday, June 20, 2011

10 Fresh New Ways To Promote Your Business

As technology progresses people progress along with it. The same applies to forms of advertising. If you are struggling to promote your business, especially an online one, you know just how hard it is to get noticed and get yourself some customers.

There is a condition that I have termed advertising blindness. We are so constantly bombarded with ads that we subconsciously block them out. So the question is, just how do you get your advertising noticed ?

I have come up with 10 fresh new ways to advertise your business. These are all offline ideas and budget conscious.

* Flyer Dogging - This one involves some stealth. You sneak up on a blind person out walking with their guide dog. Tape a flyer to each side of the dog. They will walk around unaware that they are promoting your business. The best part is they tend to walk slowly so other pedestrians have a good chance to see your brilliant advertising. Don’t worry, the owner won’t know it is there.

*Boomgating - Getting the attention of motorists without causing an accident can be very tricky. That is where boomgating comes in. You tape a banner to a boomgate. The motorist is stuck there with your ad right in front of them. Works especially well at train crossings and other places where motorists are stuck for some time.

*The Running Man - So you have a tshirt with your company info on it, yet no one pays it any attention. Time to do the running man. Go into the city and walk into a shop, turn around and run. Thinking you have stolen something everyone will be looking at you, guaranteed. The more astute among them will memorise what is written on your tee.

*Fake Celebrity - For this one you or one of your friends need to resemble a celebrity. People will talk about it if they think the Mythbusters are at the local laundromat to see if (insert your product) explodes in a washing machine or Gail is buying a heap of boxes to hold all the (insert your product) Oprah is going to give away on her next show.

*Subliminal Religion - You need to be an atheist for this one. Approach your local churches and offer to print out the services for them. You then add some subliminal messages into the readings or hymns. “And God said unto Moses, Thou needest to stand out loud, Yay much like a good photo manipulation.”

*Paper Round - This one is great for more reason than one. It gets you away from your computer for awhile, some much needed exercise and you get paid for it. All you have to do is get a paper round. You insert one of your flyers into each paper before you deliver it. It is that simple.

*The Argument - Get one of your friends and head out to a cafe, pub or similar. Then start a heated debate about which is better - your brand or a well known brand. No one else around will have heard of your brand but they will have heard of the well known one. Make sure you mention that your brand is cheaper. They are bound to google it.

*Vantastic - We have all been stuck behind a caravan on a long trip. By hanging around the right service station you can tape a banner to the back of a lot of these monstrosities. Now all the lucky motorists will have something to look at as the traffic builds up. This tactic also works for long haul trucks.

*Photo Bombing - This is where you get yourself in the background of someones photo. Make sure that your promotional tshirt can be easily seen. The best places for this are weddings. Those shots will be around for ever, sitting on a mantlepiece and if you are really good they might even turn up on a photo bombing site. Double win.

*What The Doctor Ordered - For this one you need to print out some nice, glossy, full page ads. Now go steal your Nans month old Womens Weekly and New Idea magazines. Flick through each one and find an ad space opposite an engaging story in each one. Carefully glue your ad in on top of the original. Once the glue is dry you can drop them off at the waiting rooms of doctors, dentists etc. They will be there for years.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Zazzle Prostitution

Why zazzling is like prostitution

You tend to work mainly at night

You are rewarded for fulfilling a customers dreams

When people ask you about your job you have trouble explaining it

The customer pays a lot of money but the employer keeps most of it

Friendships fall apart and you end up only talking to people in the same profession

You have to do untastefull things to get customers
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